People often tell me I can be the most awkward of individuals. To which I say, “Good.” I love awkward situations. Why? Because they make great stories. I’d say about 84% of my stories are awkward moments that that person probably brushed off and I kept it in my heart forever… Or for like a week.
Many of these moments have recurring elements to them. Same sport, different ballpark you could say. So I will give to you, the people, my top 5 favorite awkward scenarios.
Honorable Mention: The ‘failed high five attempt’ scenario
Plain and simple. You go in for the high five, and you two either barely make contact; or miss completely, hitting thin air.
5. The ‘bump into someone and then you both shimmy because you don’t know which way the other is going’ scenario
It always happens in the halls, and you try to laugh it off like nothing happened; but in the moment one of you is usually in a panic. I remember it happened one time my senior year of high school to a freshman and I think he soiled himself… Because I was a badass senior who didn’t play by the rules. No one’s. Not even my own. Eventually you go your separate ways and feel some sort of embarrassment that you can’t even pick a direction to go in, but it’s all in good fun because that person probably feels the same way.
4. The ‘Hey what’s up?’ ‘how you doing?’ scenario
You’ve done it before and you just can’t admit it to yourself. Someone says, “What’s up,” or, “How are you,” and you respond with THE EXACT SAME THING. Essentially accomplishing nothing in the conversation. Neither of you knows what is up or how the other is doing. You don’t even think twice about it until you’re about ten feet away from the person and you come to the realization that that person may think you’re a parrot or just an idiot… Not to worry, they are thinking you think that of them.
3. The ‘I just said the exact opposite of what I wanted to say’ scenario
It is very similar to number 4, only you don’t repeat what the other person said. You just simply say something completely wrong. I’ve seen it happen on multiple accounts. Example, Someone once said to my friend, “Hey!” They then replied, “Good, you?” Yeah that’s just not the right response at all. Now you’re just jumping to conclusions. Now I’ll tell you a story that happened to your’s truly his Junior year of high school. I’m walking in the hall and I see my Spanish teacher. I plan on saying hi to her in the Spanish language to prove to her I do my homework. She then proceeds to say, “Hola.” I then have a big smile on my face and say, “Gracias.” I JUST KEPT WALKING OUT OF PURE EMBARRASSMENT. The fact that that of all things came out of my mouth. Not even a, “Como está,” or, you know, “¡Hola!”
2. The ‘double thank you when someone holds two doors for you’ scenario
You know exactly what I’m talking about. Someone holds a door open for you and you say the traditional, “Thank you,” and go about your business. However you see another door about six feet away and then the person holds that door open for you as well. You’re not gonna NOT say thank you. So you say that thank you but can’t help but feel it wasn’t as sincere as the last one. It’s kind of out of annoyance. So whenever I’m in this situation I will do one of two things: I will either let that person hold the door open for me and I will say enthusiastically, “Thanks again!” in the hopes that I will get a chuckle and maybe their phone number. The second is I will physically sprint to the second door to hold open for them and say, “Thought I’d return the favor.” I realize now that these are actually gateways to even more awkward situations.
1. the ‘oh crap, that hot girl/guy just saw me staring at her, I need to make it seem like I wasn’t’ scenario
You’re ACTUALLY lying to yourself if you haven’t experienced this. You are in class or just walking somewhere and you see a girl or even a guy and you say, “I would love to hold hands with that person.” You’re staring off thinking about your life together and then all of a sudden, “CRAP HE/SHE SEES ME.” You then do everything in your power to make sure that that person doesn’t realize that you weren’t staring at them. You pretend you’re reading something on the wall. You say hi to the person next to them regardless if they know you or not. You just stare off into space like as if you saw a fly or something, I don’t know. Look back down at your phone. Regardless we have all had that drop in our stomachs when we think that this person has caught us, “Creeping.” That guy/girl is on the same page as you, no doubt. They’ve been caught staring at someone and not known what to do.
These encounters may be awkward, uncomfortable, and sometimes just not right; but learn to embrace them. They are all relatable, as in they happen to literally everyone on this green earth. Feel free to comment and let me know your favorite awkward situation and maybe share a story.